Report Card

Someone who has always needed positive feedback, I sometimes wish I could get someone to step into my life and tell me how I'm doing. I crave confirmation that the steps I am taking are actually good ones, that the effort I am making is actually worth it.

Lifestyle changes are always met with skepticism and resistance. First of all, I have to convince myself that talking the step is necessary and possible. "I CAN use recycled toilet paper!" Then I have to muster up the energy to make the change, something that is actually hard to do, especially since the change will probably be uncomfortable and more expensive. All the while, this will be met with resistance from family members, who will complain about the new toilet paper - after all, THEY don't want to change. And other people will make fun and make comments. "Do you think it makes a difference?" "But this other stuff is so much softer!"

And even after I am used to the change, after it has been made and has become part of my new lifestyle, I am acutely aware that it is not The Norm. That most people use other kids of toilet paper. The softer, bleached, worse for the Earth kind. The kind advertised on TV that take up most of the supermarket aisle.

So, am I doing something good, or am I simply making choices that separate me from the rest of society?

It's hard to know. There are so many differing opinions about what is helpful and what is good, particularly when products are taken into account. Do chemicals in soaps matter? Why is all the organic produce wrapped in plastic?

I need a mentor. I need a report card.